One thing before the prayer. Earth Is Not My Home: The Pilgrim Vault closes tonight at 11:59 PM Central. It's pay what you want, and after midnight it's gone. The name comes from the people in Hebrews 11 who never got settled here and said so out loud.
"These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth." Hebrews 11:13
If that's you, get it before it closes: deadhidden.org/pilgrim-vault
Most of the arguments you lose at night are with people who are already asleep.
You lie there and rebuild what was said at supper. You give yourself the better line and you give them the worse one. By one o'clock you've won three times, and you still can't sleep, because the one you were really arguing with was you. You can roll over and face the wall, and the argument rolls over with you. There's no getting up and leaving the room when the trouble is in you.
David knew that bed.
"Stand in awe, and sin not: commune with your own heart upon your bed, and be still. Selah." Psalm 4:4
He didn't tell you to stop thinking. He told you who to be honest with, and then he told you to be still. So pray it like this.
Lord Jesus,
I've been holding court in the dark again. I'm the judge and the lawyer and the only witness, and somehow I keep ruling in my own favor. You heard what was really said today. You know which part of this is their fault and which part I carried in with me before anybody opened their mouth.
I keep telling myself one more pass will fix it. It won't. I've been over it so many times the words have worn smooth, and I still haven't said the true thing, which is that some of this is pride. Show me the rest of it before morning, even the part I'd rather not see.
If I owe somebody an apology, let me make it plain tomorrow, without a defense folded up inside it. If I'm the one who was wronged, keep me from feeding on it in the dark like it's supper.
I can't keep my own heart tonight. I've proven that for three hours. So I'm handing it to You, and I'm asking You to do what I can't, which is make me still.
Thank You that I've brought You worse than this and woke up still Yours.
In Jesus' name, Amen.
"I will both lay me down in peace, and sleep: for thou, LORD, only makest me dwell in safety." Psalm 4:8
